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the endo is back. big time.

i'm sick about thirteen days a month now, sick meaning I'm not able to function the way a normal human being can. Every day I wake up feeling like puking, and most days I do. My doctor finally gave me a prescription for percocet (yes, I'm being very very careful), which takes out most of the pain but has the nasty effect of combing with my cymbalta to make me throw up, sometimes fifteen times a day. It's been bad to say the least. I'm still working as much as I can, trying to make some money. I'm living back at my mom's which is really nice 98% of the time. I'm trying to stay optimistic, keep my life going and my heart strong as long as I can, but it's so hard sometimes. There's days I just wake up and cry and pray to be back asleep where it doesn't hurt so much. It feels like a sledgehammer being thrown into me. I can't even begin to describe how terrible the pain is. But I have to keep fighting, have to keep searching. I'm trying acupunture now, which showed me a little relief. And I'm seeing my specialist on the 2nd, so hopefully that will bring something good...maybe another surgery?

sigh...

(also i bought a really sweet bong today)

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September 2008

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